what i've learned along the way
the first impression . . .
Published on August 28, 2004 By lobsterhunter In Personal Relationships
Do you think there is only one person for each of us? I'm not so sure I completely buy into the soulmate theory. As romantic the idea seems, it's a bit discouraging. Especially if your like me, and the playing field appears pretty narrow.

Tonight I had coffee with a total stranger. A mutual friend set us up, and although the conversation was great, I didn't walk away feeling WOWed by the experience. He was a nice guy, and I was impressed with him in many ways. However, I found myself critiquing his every comment. I was annoyed with my own behavior, and I feel like I may have sabbotaged the whole evening.

On the way home I was reflecting on my standards, and I began to question whether or not my expectations truly are too high. Do I really believe there is a Mr. Wonderful out there, who was created just for me? Am I too picky, and will I always recognize the character defects before I see their assets? Should there be this instant connection, and is he thinking the same things about me? I guess it's just my insecure nature, but I don't like the whole "dating" ritual.

This blog really has no point, so I'll quit now.

on Aug 29, 2004
It's good to have standards, especially as a Christian. But, you have to look at it morally, I think. Obviously he needs to measure up to your morals, or AT LEAST respect yours, if you understand what I'm saying. I guess think, "can I live with this?" and if not, then I guess move on. I think the "soulmate" thing is pretty much bogus. Obviously God knows the future and knows who you will marry, but I think that as humans we could be happy with a number of different people. That's just my opinion. I know what you mean about "critiquing his every move," and I, as well, get annoyed with my behaviour.

BTW, thanks for the recommendation of that book by Beth Moore. I'm ordering it soon. Take care.

on Aug 29, 2004
Thanks for the comment. I'm glad to know someone out there understands my delima. I hope you enjoy the book. We will have to chat again soon.
on Sep 03, 2004
I beleave that God has the perfect man for every woman. The problem is we are human and want to add our wants and desires in the mix. Take time to hear what your heart is telling you and God's perfect man for you will shine through. But of course I am a hopeless romantic. Married for 26 year to not a perfect man but the right one for me. Love him more today than the first day and it just keeps growing. Hang in there the right one will come along or back into your life if he has been there already and left. Your such a special girl or I guess woman know. Love you.
on Sep 07, 2004

on Sep 07, 2004
just play'n girl! Your standards are NOT too high, and the dating ritual is BOGUS!!! It's shit, that's why you're so confused.